6 Tips to Manage Microaggressions
Microaggressions can be subtle yet impactful experiences. Learn to navigate them with these tips.
Have you ever thought about how you want to manage microaggressions? Do you feel torn between addressing the microaggression or ignoring it, in hopes it will stop? These are very common fears and concerns many marginalized groups experience daily. Whether in a school setting, work setting, or with family and friends, learning about microaggressions can help lessen anxiety. This is my hope for you.
Microaggressions consist of verbal (words), behavioral (actions), or environmental actions (like confederate flags, statues of confederate soldiers, etc.) that promote hostility towards marginalized groups, such as people of color, women, LGBTQIA+ community, persons with disabilities, and religious minorities. Microaggressions can be intentional or unintentional and express biases and prejudices towards target groups.
Manage Microaggressions Tip #1: Name What Is Happening
Microaggressions happen in different ways. Before you respond, it is important to understand and be able to name what is happening to you. The next few sections define different kinds of microaggressions.
What are Microassaults?
Microassaults are obvious forms of prejudice where someone deliberately acts in discriminatory ways. They can consist of jokes or sayings that degrade racial and marginalized groups.
Examples:
- When someone says, "That is so ghetto!" to express that something is not up to one's expectations or standards.
- A person of color being followed in a store.
- Racial profiling by law enforcement agencies.
What are Microinsults?
Microinsults consist of statements or behaviors that unconsciously communicate discriminatory rhetoric to target groups.
Examples:
- Telling a person of color "You are very articulate," implying that people of color do not traditionally speak good English or may lack education.
- "You're different and not like most ____ people."
- Locking car doors when a person of color walks by.
What are Microinvalidations?
Microinvalidations are verbal statements that deny or undermine the experiences of someone who belongs to a target group.
Examples:
- When someone says that racism does not exist, the individual is invalidating the experiences and reality of people of color.
- "When I look at you, I do not see color."
- Repeatedly using the wrong pronouns.
Managing Microaggressions Tip #2: Asking for Clarification
- "What did you mean when you said that?"
- "Could you help me understand what makes you say that?"
Managing Microaggressions Tip #3: Meeting Them with Empathy and Expressing Your Feelings
- You can ask someone how they might feel if someone said something like that about the group they identify with or someone they love.
- You can also tell them that they are too smart to say hurtful things like that and it can be hurtful to you and others.
Managing Microaggressions Tip #4: Challenging Their Bias and Prejudices
- You may give information, share your own experiences, and offer them different perspectives.
- You may say "Actually in my experience ____."
- Or you could say "You know I actually used to think that, but then I learned ____."
Managing Microaggressions Tip #5: Targeting the Behavior and Not the Person
- It is important to target the unhelpful behavior and not the person's character in order to avoid defensiveness.
- We want to help promote education and not shame someone into understanding.
Managing Microaggressions Tip #6: Walking Away from the Conversation
- If you feel like you or the person who used the microaggression may be emotionally charged and the conversation is no longer productive, you could say "I feel like we are both emotionally charged at this time and we can revisit this topic at a later time."
Managing Microaggressions Tip #7: Seeking Support
- It can be helpful and empowering to reach out to an ally, such as a co-worker, classmate, family member, friend, therapist, or someone you feel safe sharing your experiences with.
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