A Child Therapist Shares How to Address Difficult Topics with Your Children
Parents often ask how to talk to their kids about divorce, sex, death, puberty, war, tragedies, and so many other things.
As a child therapist who works with children and teens, parents/guardians often ask for guidance on how to talk to their kids about divorce, sex, death, puberty, war, tragedies, and so many other things.
After all, there is constant media coverage of endless amounts of complicated, heartbreaking, and serious circumstances and events that children are bound to become aware of one way or another.
Social media like TikTok, Snapchat, Instagram, and YouTube also expose our kids to a wide range of sometimes inappropriate topics that understandably lead to lots of questions.
How to Address Difficult Topics with Your Children
Whether you're talking to your first grader about a mass shooting or your high schooler about sex and healthy relationships, here are some things to keep in mind before, during, and after a heart-to-heart with your child.
Addressing Difficult Topics with Your Child Tip #1: Get Curious About Your Discomfort
Difficult topics can feel even more difficult to talk about with your kids when they cause you discomfort. It's common to feel weird thinking about having the sex talk with your child, but why?
There is no rush in having difficult conversations so take the time to lean into your own feelings before having a conversation with your child.
Addressing Difficult Topics with Your Child Tip #2: Find Out What They Know
A conversation won't be successful unless you know where the conversation needs to start and you're both on the same page.
Addressing Difficult Topics with Your Child Tip #3: Don't Worry About Being Perfect
You might feel like you're just stumbling around when you talk to your child about difficult things and that's okay.
Addressing Difficult Topics with Your Child Tip #4: Pick a Good Time and Place to Talk
It's important to think about when and where you will have these conversations.
Addressing Difficult Topics with Your Child Tip #5: Provide Information with Age-Appropriate Words and Concepts
Keep your kiddo's developmental age and maturity level in mind while you're talking.
Addressing Difficult Topics with Your Child Tip #6: Tell the Truth
Kids have great BS detectors and lying to your children sends them the message that when scary or confusing things happen, you are not the person they can go to.
Addressing Difficult Topics with Your Child Tip #7: Share Your Feelings and Encourage Your Children to Share Theirs.
Modeling the appropriate identification and expression of feelings is just as important and who better for them to learn from than you!
Addressing Difficult Topics with Your Child Tip #8: Encourage Your Child to Think About Solutions
Ask your child what they would do in certain situations, give them a say, and help them take an active role in feeling safe.
Addressing Difficult Topics with Your Child Tip #9: Be Ready for an Ongoing Discussion
Let your child know that you'll make yourself available if they want to talk more or if any questions pop up.
Addressing Difficult Topics with Your Child Tip #10: Know When to Get Help
If you have any concerns about your children, child therapists can help their brains understand things in different ways.
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